Forms of Humiliation

Forms of Humiliation

An insult usually hurts, but it is important to resolve in your own mind, based on evidence, why the insult hurts. What loss does it represent to you? Decide if the insult:

• is an unjustified attack that does not decrease your stature, diminish your self-image, nor tarnish your public image or reputation, or
• is justified and has diminished your public image or reputation, or
• is justified and has diminished or revised your self-image.

Begin the analysis by deciding if the insult is based on information that accurately represents you. Then reflect and consider if your image accurately represents your stature. If you decide the insult is unjustified then you can simply ignore it (“don't take the bait”) or you can describe why it is unfair and ask your offender for an apology. If your public image exceeds your stature, then the insult may a justifiable retaliation for your arrogance and it may contain an important message you can learn from. If the insult is justified it may cause you to feel shame and then lead you to revise your self-image to better align it with your stature. The insult is never justified if it is an attempt to reduce your stature below the threshold of human dignity.

Humans have many ways to slight others and humiliate them. For example:

• Overlooking someone, taking them for granted, ignoring them, giving them the silent treatment, treating them as invisible, or making them wait unnecessarily for you,
• Rejecting someone, holding them distant, abandoned, or isolated,
• Withholding acknowledgement, denying recognition, manipulating recognition,
• Denying someone basic social amenities, needs, or human dignity,
• Manipulating people or treating them like objects (it) or animals, rather than as a person (thou).
• Treating people unfairly,
• Domination, control, manipulation, abandonment,
• Threats or abuse including: verbal (e.g. name calling), physical, psychological, or sexual,
• Assault, attack, or injury
• Reduction in rank, responsibility, role, title, positional power, or authority,
• Betrayal, or being cheated, lied to, defrauded, suckered, or duped,
• Being laughed at, mocked, teased, ridiculed, given a dirty look, spit on, or made to look stupid or foolish.
• Being the victim of a practical joke, prank, or confidence scheme.
• False accusation or insinuation,
• Public shame, disrespect, or being dis'ed, downgraded, defeated, or slighted
• Forced nakedness,
• Rape or incest,
• Seeing your love interest flirt with another, induced jealousy, violating your love interest, cuckolding,
• Seeing your wife, girlfriend, sister, or daughter sexually violated,
• Dishonor,
• Poverty, unemployment, bad investments, debt, bankruptcy, foreclosure, imprisonment, homelessness, punishment, powerlessness,
• Denigration of a person's values, beliefs, heritage, race, gender, appearance, characteristics, or affiliations,
• Dependency, especially on weaker people,
• Losing a dominance contest. Being forced to submit.
• Trespass such as violating privacy or other boundaries,
• Violating, denying, or suppressing human rights,
• Losing basic personal freedoms such a mobility, access, or autonomy; being controlled, dominated, intruded on, exploited, or manipulated,
• Diminished competency resulting from being disabled, immobilized, tricked, weakened, trapped, mislead, thwarted goals, opposed, sabotage, or let down.
• Diminished resources resulting from being defrauded, robbed, cheated, evicted, or being deprived of privileges, or rights,
• Having safety or security reduced by intimidation or threat,
• Dismissing, discounting, or silencing your story,
• Being treated as an equal by a lower stature person. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------